Last Sunday a friend dropped by with an apple pie. She has been a great friend for decades and a great chef in her own right but I digress.
Earlier that day I had been talking to somebody who asked me a question. They asked me if I felt there was a good reason for marriage. I expressed my thoughts. Later I talked about this topic with my friend who brought me the pie.
I voiced my thoughts on various aspects of why I felt people get married. Building and sharing a life. Building and raising a family. Many of the reasons seemed very obvious. There are countless reasons for marriage just as there are countless reasons not to be married.
Over the last few days thoughts would dart in and out of my mind. Reasons for marriage change as we grow older. Security? Companionship? Friendship? Sharing a recall of things two people have accomplished together in life?
I recall a conversation with a friend who wanted to leave his wife. His reason to me was, she does not want to climb mountains with me.....
I felt his logic was a bit shallow when this statement was made to me over a decade ago.
I recall a conversation with a friend who wanted to leave his wife. His reason to me was, she does not want to climb mountains with me.....
I felt his logic was a bit shallow when this statement was made to me over a decade ago.
He did not see how much she cared for him and how she altered much of her own life to support him in his quest to build a business (he was already gainfully employed as a side note). She supported his hobbies and interests. She helped him accomplish his dreams in his own life. She was there to catch him when he would fall.
He was not able to see what she had done for him as they built a life and raised a daughter. The importance of her past work, love and effort were overshadowed by his own desires to climb a mountain.
In the end, her intentions and real actions carried little weight. The lack of climbing mountains was the logic he used to end the relationship.
So often in the end one person just turns their back on the other and walks away. Marriage? Vows? Promises? Government? The economy? There are a lot of folks out there that just quit, lie or just give up.
One just walks away.
As we grow older our accomplishments are behind us rather than in front of us. Some people have an adverse reaction to growing older. Many look as their life as a race to try to accomplish all possible things before the grow old. Wake up folks. If you are acting like this you may already be old.
One must earn growing old. It is not something that you can just make happen by taking a test or procuring some sort of certificate. There is value in age. Knowledge. Experience.
By all means, go out into the world each day and make the most out of each day but do not turn your eyes away from people who hurt others, people who turn their back on people who need help where you can provide help.
As we age our focus on what is important changes. We shift our resources from home, car, clothes and possessions to things like insurance, health care or other things that give us a sense of security. In some ways it is a false sense of security.
Perhaps this is one reason for marriage? Perhaps it is a reason some couples stay together later in life.
There is a story on marrige in the Huffington Post that talks about marriage:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/11/18/time-marriage-study-four-_n_785746.html
There is a story on marrige in the Huffington Post that talks about marriage:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/11/18/time-marriage-study-four-_n_785746.html
In the end none of us want to die alone. In actuality though, it is the journey to our death that is something to think about. Perhaps one more reason for marriage or a partnership in life.
Myles Rose is the founder of Guitar Amplifier Blueprinting which provides support services and training for touring bands and individuals as well as blueprinting services. You may contact me from the link. My direct contact information is provided as well as links to two of the Internet forums where I answer technical questions. You may also ask questions in any post in this blog by using the comment application on each post.
When I am not doing something related to music I do what I can to support the homeless of Los Angeles either directly on the streets at night or through my good friends at Union Rescue Mission.
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