Are You Young or Old?

Are you young or old?  Debated.  Argued throughout history.  The answer is easy.  It is not open to interpretation.

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It is not a matter of how you feel or how you look.  It is not a matter of health or lifestyle. There are healthy people who are eighty and people who are fifteen who are racked with pain in the throws of a horrible disease.

Your attitude has nothing to do with age although many old people are bitter that their time is coming to and end on this planet and angry with those younger. Many old people have a bit of an attitude.  Cut them some slack.  They are not comfortable with how the cycle of life works.

They may be upset by the image they see in the mirror.  It is not the boy or girl who they just walked past on the street.  It has nothing to do with the metallic blue hair, short skirt, tight jeans, tats or piercings.

I am not trying to be sexist but this seems to hit women harder than men.  It is what I call the balloon effect. Many older folks change shape.  Think of it as if you partially close their mouth and clamp their nose closed and then force a compressed air hose in a small opening in their mouth.  Turn on the air and just of blow them up a little.  They are still nice looking and can have lovely skin, hair and anything else than can be bought but they are just bigger.  Most old people seem to get bigger.  For the gals who are upset by my observation don't worry.  I talk about men below in the midlife crisis behavior paragraph.

When you are old you should leave less to chance and live each day with little compromise. Care less about what people think or say and pass on whatever expertise you have gathered over the course of your life to those who are young.  For you ex-military pilots, run your proverbial throttle at WEP.  

Last night during dinner I was texting with a friend who brought up the subject of a midlife crisis.  First off, let me state that there is no such thing as midlife.  Age is black and white, yes and no, true and false, one and zero.  There is only young and old.  

There is however, midlife crisis behavior.  There are many examples.  I will not go over them in a big list but a classic is the purchase of a Corvette when you are "old".  If you are a corporate type with a high disposable income, a doctor, lawyer or accountant and buy a Harley Davidson motorcycle you just might be exhibiting midlife crisis behavior but, you are not middle aged (remember, there is no such thing).  If you love to ride then buy a Triumph, Ducati, BMW, Moto Guzzi.  Side note:  Those Japanese rockets that go 200mph are for young folks.

One more way to think of this.  If I were to buy myself a Ferrari, as I stopped at a light I would get smiles and in some cases I may even find myself with a date 1/3 my age.  Would my date be interesting or fun to talk to at dinner?  I will let you come up with the odds on this one.

The Ferrari would have certain advantages for me I suppose, yet some of the statements it might make could be less than complimentary in stating who I was and might shout louder about who I was trying to be.

But, give that same car to a boy in high school and it would make a drastic change to his social life.  More bang for the buck for an 18 year old than a 68 year old in a manner of speaking.

Put your resources where they do the most good.  When you are old and there is more history in your life than future it is great to have some great history.  You can continue to make great history until you wake up on the wrong side of the dirt but you can also help the younger generation make some of their own great history.

When you are old make each day count.  Talk to strangers often. Make each meal more of an event than just putting something in your pie hole.  Learn something new.  Help somebody young on their journey.

Well, I have skirted, diverted and digressed enough already although I did hint on it when I talked about history.

The simple way to tell if you are young or old is easy and foolproof.  This method works for everybody and is tailored specifically for you.

1.  Take your current age and multiply it by two.

If you are 40 for example you will end up with the figure of 80.

2.  This is where it is tailored specifically for you.  What do you feel is your life expectancy?  This is on a personal level and will take into account your health, lifestyle, current issues and a bit of luck that you may or may not contract a fatal disease, have a heart attack, car crash, etc.  This is where there is a little wiggle room in a manner of speaking.  If there is such a thing as middle age this would be where it lies.

If you are 52 as an example, let's not fool ourselves. 52 x 2 = 104.  Really?  You want to argue the point?

3.  Based on the number you have calculated you now can ask yourself the one simple question which will clearly give you the answer to the question:

Do you have more past or future in your life?